Dear Hair…

I realize it must have been devastating when you were recently shaved off. You must feel humiliated. For that, I am sorry. Kinda. Sorta. Ok…not really.

But if you recall, it’s not like this is the first time…19.5 years ago, those nice folks down in Orlando did the same thing, and then some. And you were much longer then. Did you complain then? No, that very large, very loud man in a military uniform did not give you permission to complain. In fact, he did not appear to care about your opinion at all.

So, please, let’s stop with the recent vindictive visibility of grays, ok? Instead of hiding them, it seems you’ve released them into the wild. They are everywhere. And multiplying.

I know, I know…you think it’s distinguishing. But to me, it’s nothing more than a sign that you are ticked off. There’s just no need for that right now.

Besides, do you not recall that we have our 20-yr reunion coming up? Be nice now.

I realize it must have been devastating when you were recently shaved off. You must feel humiliated. For that, I am sorry. Kinda. Sorta. Ok…not really. But if you recall, it’s not like this is the first time…19.5 years ago, those nice folks down in Orlando did the same thing, and then some. And you…