Apologies to the CDC and WHO

Dear Centers for Disease Control and World Health Organization,

Unfortunately, we are unable to assist you with your conspiracy of fear regarding the swine flu. Yes, I do realize that you prefer us to use the term “H1N1” to make it sound sexier and more mysterious, so you’ll have to forgive that as well.

But back to our first indiscretion: we did not, and will not, be reporting the flu cases our family may nor may not have recently experienced. Especially after CBS uncovered that earlier this year hospitals were directed to cease testing for actual swine flu, and to begin reporting all possible flu cases as swine flu…and as it turns out, very few of the cases were–and are–swine flu. It does, however, help greatly exaggerate your stats and the influence of fear you wish to create.

So consider this our act of civil disobedience.

Dear Centers for Disease Control and World Health Organization, Unfortunately, we are unable to assist you with your conspiracy of fear regarding the swine flu. Yes, I do realize that you prefer us to use the term “H1N1” to make it sound sexier and more mysterious, so you’ll have to forgive that as well. But…