10 Things I’ve Learned About Marriage…

Tomorrow is our 18th anniversary. For some, that’s a huge milestone…for others (like my grandparents, married 65 years before grandpa passed) it’s just a drop in the bucket. Either way, there are some things I’ve learned along the way.

1. Marriage isn’t about feelings.  Emotions ebb and flow. Romantic feelings don’t keep you together…sometimes it requires sheer stubbornness (some call that commitment, but stubbornness is more colorful).
2. Marriage is about presence. You have to show up. You have to be there. The job (or hobbies, or friends) can’t take up so much that the other person starves for the time and attention they occupy.
3. Marriage requires communication. Talk. About feelings, about needs, about all the little things before they become big things.
4. Marriage is about growing…individually and together. Maturing isn’t just for cheese and wine. You both will…look forward to it.
5. Marriage exposes faults. You will see each others’ faults way too closely because of the close proximity, if nothing else.
6. Marriage is about acceptance. Those faults in #5? Realize the other person sees yours too…choose to accept them rather than sit in judgment.
7. Marriage is work. Just like a job (but with considerably better benefits, if you think about it), you have to put in the work and the time.
8. Marriage is best when you work together. Whether it’s a small things like working in the yard, or a bigger thing like dealing with a child that’s in critical condition in the hospital, be together.
9. Marriage is a blessing. Just like any gift, you have to accept it. But no single human relationship will affect your life for the better than marriage.
10. Marriage is good. It is. Perfect, no. But good. Enjoy it.

Any to add?

Tomorrow is our 18th anniversary. For some, that’s a huge milestone…for others (like my grandparents, married 65 years before grandpa passed) it’s just a drop in the bucket. Either way, there are some things I’ve learned along the way. Marriage isn’t about feelings.  Emotions ebb and flow. Romantic feelings don’t keep you together…sometimes it requires…