Maybe This is Harder Than I Thought…

By the title, I am referring to the situation with Evanna’s diagnosis and prognosis. What I’m not saying though, is anything different than what I’ve written earlier…that out of all the possibilities we’d been facing, the diagnosis really was a relief to us. Spina bifida is a known entity, other possible outcomes weren’t. With spina bifida, there are surgeries and treatments…the other possibilities, because we were looking at structural issues with the brain and its development, no so much.

We’re also not ignoring the reality: it’ll be tough at times. But we’ll have our little girl, and her prognosis is excellent. She is our blessing.

But it may be affecting me more than I thought, to be open and honest. Last night I was rocked by a very vivid dream that I’m still emotionally processing…and kind of shocked I didn’t wake up either yelling or sobbing. (Hey, I did write I was being open and honest here…plus I have a history of waking up from dreams with laughing and talking, so it’s not outside the realm of possibilities).

And no, I don’t really want to share details–there were plenty of things that coincide with our reality for me to know it was related to Evanna and her diagnosis.

And yes, I know it was just a dream, and that emotions can be fickle things.

And yes, we are still positive about it, and strong in our hope.

But if nothing else, especially after Saturday’s little scare (oh, I hadn’t written about that…), I realize there are a lot of folks walking beside us in this journey, willing and waiting to help. We’re incredibly grateful for that.

By the title, I am referring to the situation with Evanna’s diagnosis and prognosis. What I’m not saying though, is anything different than what I’ve written earlier…that out of all the possibilities we’d been facing, the diagnosis really was a relief to us. Spina bifida is a known entity, other possible outcomes weren’t. With spina…